Writing down Egos

Posted May 3rd, 2008 by jonny5

Hello everyone

One of my problems with all the subconscious states is that I am used to forget everything that comes up in the mind. Awareness is difficult to hold for me and I find it easy to forget about my internal state that was just 5 minutes ago. It is like the egos hypnotize me in a way that every internal state just disappears out of my memory. Even if awareness is good for some time, I do not remember the egos a day ago, unless they have been big, and I less remember them some days or weeks ago.

One day I started writing down egos that I spotted during the day on my mobile phone, wherever I saw something I just typed in the time and the description of what I spotted, what the subconscious state made me feel and think.

I had some problems with that as I can’t write down a lot of data on the mobile phone pad in a short time, and the crashes sometimes erased half a day of recordings, but I added the place and/or the situation, so that I got a picture of the ego when I would read the journal later on, and it got more and more as I got used to write down more and more I saw.

Then I wrote them down in much more detail on paper for a while, like on a small organizer, and I had surprising results with it. I remember one time when I was coming back home I had trouble with a big ego and when I was writing it down I remembered something, I looked back in the journal and I could read there how I reacted in the past to it step by step. The same internal things came up in the same order.

I now use a PDA for writing these journals, I can write down a lot of data in a short time and I can use various ways of highlighting various things in the journal, which makes it easier to read it later on, e.g. when I write down a collection of egos which I want to work on further in the Meditation on the Ego.

With these journals I spotted a couple of things, egos that come up on the way to some places, on the way back, egos that come up on different situations and activities, stories they want to generate in the mind, egos that follow one another, etc.

I find that the remembrance on egos has increased with writing them down in time, and when I see an ego in the journal for some or even many days in a row I find it gives me more motivation to work harder on it.

All the best to everyone
jonny

That's great, Johnny. I find

gigi0819's picture
On May 4th, 2008 Gabrielle says:

That's great, Johnny. I find the same thing. I have ego amnesia by the end of the day ;)

I also have found that the times in which I have progressed the most, I was usually recording such inner states and the doing then meditation on an ego practice often.

I am trying to find a way to incorporate something similar to this in my life. I find it difficult to use electronics in this way and notebooks are often too big to carry around. I'll try to figure something out though.

Gabrielle

hey Jonny, What helped for

ptr1968's picture
On May 4th, 2008 ptr1968 says:

hey Jonny,

What helped for me is to make retrospection a routine, everyday after/before dinner. It also helps for remembering dreams.
Maybe can try before the retrospection a mantra for remembering.
Also I try to make awareness the most important thing of the day.

All the best,

Peter

Thanks Jonny, I found a

Vadim's picture
On May 4th, 2008 Vadim says:

Thanks Jonny,

I found a similar technique in one of a self-help psychological books, it was so helpful for me in the difficult time of my life.

Everyday I trained myself to write down whatever was coming to my mind untill I would feel better.
Then, my goal was to read what I've wrote, and sort of meditate on it, try to underststand what's going on inside me and to practice detachment from it.

When I was able not to get fascinated and to feed egos, it was something like doing serene reflection and psycho-analysys from meditation on the ego practice (Gnostic Wisdom course) as taught by Belzebuub, with taking notes.

Best wishes to all!

Hi Jonny, That's really

anonymous's picture
On May 4th, 2008 MikeL says:

Hi Jonny,

That's really interesting.

I, too, have found that I generally miss a lot of egos unless they have been relatively big, or unless I've done a good meditation on an ego and come to consciously see them. But there are many that I observe but don't necessarily remember - very subtle things.

Thanks for sharing that technique. I think I should start doing that!

All the best!

Mike

Hello Jonny, Writing to

Silvia.s.c.'s picture
On May 4th, 2008 Silvia says:

Hello Jonny,

Writing to remember is really good. It has always been a big help to me. I like to keep a daily journal and write out my day before I do a retrospection and meditation on egos.
I'm also thankful for poeple from thousands of years ago to write stuf down so that they and us(all humanity) could remember. like the gospels and things like that.

Writing will improve your memory and make your retrospections easier and more vivid.

keep up!

Silvia

Hey Jonny, That's a great

davidg's picture
On May 6th, 2008 David G says:

Hey Jonny,

That's a great idea, thanks for bringing it up!

Gabrielle, I have a friend who carries round a small diary, one of the ones that's only about 7cm X 9cm. It fits in his back pocket, and it has a little pencil that goes with it that slots into the spine. Maybe you could give one of those a shot if you can find them? Maybe they'd be cheap too now we're almost half way through the year.

Thanks,
David